For Dad, On Mother’s Day

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Dad has officially kicked Stupid Cancer in the ass and I wanted to share my ecstatic relief with the world in more than just a Facebook status. I hope this blog helps you understand why losing him to Stupid Cancer was not an option. I love you Dad!

My dad taught me that if you put salt on your drink napkin at restaurants, then your glass won’t stick.

He’s a pretty handy guy like that. He can fix anything, even if it’s not broken. You know that movie quote about a guy who’s lost in the woods only needing a pocket knife and a toothpick to be able to build a shopping mall? Yeah, that’s my dad. He probably wouldn’t even need the toothpick.

He used to be really good at carrying heavy things, but his back is now just as bad as mine and his strong arms that have moved me in and out of shitty apartments have been replaced by whoever is trying to date me (or vice versa) at the moment.

He’s taught me how to fish. More importantly, he taught me how to get away with reading a magazine in the boat while he fishes.

He’s taught me a lot of “reals”. Like what a real gentleman should be—and do and say and not do and not say. What a REAL handshake and hug should feel like.

He taught me how to appreciate good food. Notably—freshly caught fish v. frozen, medium steak v. well done, and homemade barbeque sauce and honey mustard v. packaged. He taught me how to recognize the taste of venison when it’s snuck into food, looking and acting like beef. He taught me how to cut meat properly.

My dad taught me that it can always be worse—you could be shot at or bitten by a rattlesnake or have to frantically jump off a hotel balcony half-naked. He taught me to “get a helmet” and “poop in one hand, wish in the other and see which one fills up faster”. He taught me sarcasm.

He taught me what kind of boys to bring home and what kind of boys to avoid. By watching the way he treats my mom, he’s taught me what kind of husband I want. By experiencing the way he treats me, he’s taught me what kind of father I want for my children.

He has TRIED to teach me about politics, cars, the military, and history. I have retained about 1% of that information. Sorry Dad.

He taught me not to put up with anybody’s shit.

He taught me that anyone can be a father, but it takes someone really special to be a dad.

He’s taught me so much over the years and I know that he’ll continue to teach me for many, many more years.

Thanks for being so strong Daddy. You couldn’t have given Mom a better Mother’s Day gift this year!

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One response »

  1. Alysha, This is an awesome tribute to your dad and I love that you let him know how you feel about him on a regular basis. We all know what a big softy he is and it’s important for him and every dad for that matter, to really hear how their kids feel and appreciate them. For some people a scare like this is a needed wake-up call to reflect and share true feelings before it’s “too late.”

    On a side note: I am really stressed out as to whether I have used correct punctuation and grammar now!!!

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